Confession time. I work blue. I have a potty mouth. Have since I was 12 years old. That’s no shock to anyone who follows me, has ever met me, talked to me. And certainly not to anyone who has ever had cocktails with me.
An author I follow on Facebook posted this photo, stating that she wanted these socks. Being that I think they’re fun, optimistic, and cool, I shared the photo, stating that I needed a pair. That’s it. And since most of my Facebook friends are adults (I have the kids on a special list so I can hide inappropriate things from them), I didn’t think a thing about it.
Shortly following my posting, this popped up in the comments section. “No cussing on Facebook. I hate that word.” Umm, okay. Good for you, I guess. After I let that sink in a while, you can imagine the thoughts and feelings that went through my head. First of all, being that I am a grown-ass woman with a mind of my own, and since I really don’t like being bossed around, I had to respond. That comment began “Seriously? Talk to the sock.” and went on from there. It wasn’t mean. Merely factual. After that, the post kind of took on a life of its own, as these things often do. My friends, all big fans of the 1st Amendment, no doubt, and who also happen to be potty mouths, came to my defense. All because of a pair of clever, cute sock with a POSITIVE message, from a company that donates part of their proceeds to Doctors Without Borders. Liberal heathens.
This got me to thinking about bad words, dirty words, “cuss” words. Most of the words our society defines as profanity have to do with normal human bodily functions or parts, while some, I admit, are kind of offensive. Like the ones that are derogatory toward females (not really many male equivalents, if you think about it). And I understand that some folks don’t care to use or hear them. That’s fine. I do understand that it’s a generational thing as well. Some older folks don’t like “dirty talk”. I respect that.
I don’t have to use profanity. I’m well-read, fairly articulate, and pretty well-educated. Hell, I’m a fuckin’ WRITER. I know words.
Truth is, I like profanity. I like to use it. I think it has its place. Especially for shock value. That delights me to no end. Profanity is like a spice. Us it appropriately and sparingly.
So in honor of my delicate Facebook friend, I decided to compose what I call MY BIG LIST OF THE MOST OFFENSIVE WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. And guess what? Fuck isn’t even on it.
MY BIG LIST OF THE MOST OFFENSIVE WORDS (and/or terms) IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE
Murder. Massacre. School shooting. Killing. Bloody. Sniper. Shooter. Senseless. Attack. Assault. Hate. Bias. Oppression. Racism (and every racial or religious slur that goes along with it). Homophobia. (Ditto). Misogyny. Discrimination. Disenfranchise. Hate crime. War. Bomb. Genocide. Abuse. Slavery. Rape. Mutilation. Violence. Poverty. Hunger. Need. Illness. Want. Denial. Greed. Materialism. Ostentatious. Sanctimony. Judgment. Hypocrisy. Disrespect. Inequality. Gullible. Rigid. Fear (of anyone different than you). Blasphemy (as in religion used to further your own personal or political agenda. Also to frighten or threaten.). Anti-choice. Anti-science. Willful ignorance (“What is “What Fox “News” has created, Alex?”) I’m sure I’ll be adding to the list as time goes on.
These are the words we should try to abolish from our national lexicon. They’re hurtful, evil, and nasty. They represent things that do real harm in the world. They can ruin or end lives. They have real life consequences. I doubt anyone is going to die from that pair of socks.
I don’t know about you, but I’d much prefer to look at a rather innocuous accessory that has “fuck” woven into them than to see evidence of any of the words listed above. Guess I should never watch the news or go on Facebook, huh? Lest I go around in a perpetual state of shock. Thankfully, there have been great strides made in technology of late. Like the remote control and the unfollow button on Facebook. I use the shit out of that thing. Otherwise, I might take it upon myself to go on to someone’s private, personal space and tell them what they can or cannot post. Yikes!
But alas, the people who really need to grasp that concept probably don’t give a fuck. To each his own, I suppose.
And by the way, CARPE the FUCK out of this DIEM!
The Middle-Aged Ingenue 
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