I have a confession to make. Sometimes I do things that aren’t good for my body. I’m a sugar addict with hypoglycemia. I skip working out so I can write, sitting on my ass for hours on end. I like drinking, particularly Jack Daniels. Not drinking to excessive excess, but a couple (or 4) cocktails occasionally, very rarely – I’m not above it. I don’t get enough sleep and I have a tendency to skip meals when I get really focused.

But I don’t smoke. I never drive after drinking, and I don’t eat fast food or fried things. I have pretty much cut out soft drinks of my diet.

Alas, there is one thing I do that is seen today as the Holy Grail of Horrible.  I still sunbathe, or as we call it in the South, “lay out”.  I still rub that Hawaiian Tropic oil with no sunscreen on my legs and bake myself for as long as I can stand it. I do use sunscreen on the more sensitive areas – my chest, my face – those areas will age if they get too tan for too many years. I’m also careful with my neck, shoulders, and back. I use a different SPF for every area. I believe I, at least, look better with a little color. Fortunately, I rarely burn, and I hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. With water, not Jack Daniels.

People always think I’m making up stuff when I tell them that 2 of my doctors suggest that I get at least half an hour of sun every day. For the vitamin D, and it is beneficial to an autoimmune disorder I have.

I consider my getting a tan a public service. I still wear shorts. Not the “to the knee” kind either.  No one wants to look at my pasty white legs in shorts.  The tan does make them look better. Healthier, younger. This way, the view is a little more pleasant. You’re welcome.

I’ve used just about every self-tanner ever created with varying results. There’s a new one by Banana Boat that is the best so far. It’s not expensive and it doesn’t have “the smell”.  And no sparklies – a dead give away for the tan in a tube.

 

Applying self-tanner is something of an art in and of itself. It takes practice and a strategy. If you’re not really careful, it can look terrible. I’ve also done the spray tans at the salon. Two words about those: Donald Trump.  Also, I do not do tanning beds. I don’t trust them and I’ll be lying in a coffin soon enough, thanks.  That’s why I prefer the real thing.

As I mentioned earlier, there is an art to building a tan. If you’re hell-bent on the real thing, the key is starting slowly, say 10-15 minutes on each side. Make sure you are using sunscreen. As you begin to notice color, increase your time very gradually and decrease your SPF very gradually. If you are patient and go about the process slowly, you will have a nice sun-kissed tan. Drink lots and lots of water. So much that you have to pee on a regular basis. Dehydration is a bad thing. Take extra care not to sunburn. My pick for the best sunscreen is CeraVe SPF 50. I always use it liberally on my face, chest, and other areas more apt to burn, wrinkle, or freckle. Those spots that don’t get as much sun – to even out your look, use the self-tanner.  Probably the best advice is to use the self-tanner only.

I’m old and from that sun-worshipping generation. I’m aware that with the issues with the ozone and global warming, sun exposure is different than it was when we spent nearly every summer day at the pool or the lake.

Old habits are hard to break.  Everyone has a vice.  Mine happens to be sunbathing.